Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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