my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize