Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
