but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
