Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
