I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
