Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
