i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Randomize
