if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
