obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
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