Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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