but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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