Having a random hookup so left but love u
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
