I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
