Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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