I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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