i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
