Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
