I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
