I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
