Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
