That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Randomize