So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Randomize
