you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
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