my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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