normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
