i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
