the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
