I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
