yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
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