Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize