physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Randomize
