I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize