Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
