so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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