Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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