The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
the condom got lost in my hair
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
