we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
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