I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
