They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
