she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
