GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
you had me at cake vodka
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
