Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
be right there i have to get my cape
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize
