Got a toothbrush?
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
