I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
