Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
