you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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