Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
