Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
