I'm drive I can fine osifer
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize